Oh man let me tell you last night and this morning, morale was so bad. Persistent bladder spasms, everything about the catheter was so bad and it seemed like it would never end, the bolster stitching made it hard to move, the catheter made it hard to move, I was miserable and felt like I had no control over my body I was just in constant pain. That’s all over now!
I had my first post op visit. Catheter gone, packing gone, bolster also gone. To check how well I could pee they pumped my bladder full of water then once it was at the “if I don’t unlock my front door first try I’m going to pee on my steps” level discomfort they stopped and pulled the catheter. It hurt like hell, some screaming was involved. Then they ran me off to the bathroom to measure how much I could get out of me
The packing was the world’s most cursed clown handkerchief trick. It’s shocking how much fits in there. It was kinda a weird ticklish feeling until right at the end there was a brief bit of pain
At this point I was very exhausted but we still had more to go. My doctor referred to it as “we’re going to give you a tour” and then poked around everywhere talking about stuff while I # watched with a mirror. Some of it was pretty painful but it mostly went smoothly
Lastly he finished by showing me how to use the dilator once with him doing it then a second time with me doing it. Not gonna lie it hurt a lot more than I was expecting. Some people have talked about having a magical feeling with the first time a dilator is used I mostly just had a lot of pain. But good news there is I maxed out the depth! Doctor said I’m up there near most depth a person can get without having a much larger frame
Already my pain is way better, mobility is better, morale has gone way up, I’m so happy they didn’t have to put that catheter back in. I’m recovering really well so far even with the hardships
Update 1: My life is now a blurry disjointed mess of memories in between dilating sessions. I don’t really know how many days have passed
Update 2: I managed to get the second dilator in me almost to max depth today! Also it seems so little but today was the first time I managed to get dressed without any help. The socks were the last holdout for things I couldn’t get myself. I cried happy when I got them on. We’re going to walk around outside some more today see how far I can make it past the driveway now that I’ve conquered the backyard
I understand the time sync now. It takes me about 90 minutes from when the alarm goes off to when I’m done and I’ve got help from my mom doing things like getting me a hot water bottle and making sure I’m stocked on everything before she leaves me to my business. It would definitely be more like 2 or more hours plus a lot more exhaustion doing this by myself. My sleep schedule is completely fucked right now with everything other than dilating being in 4hr blocks
Yeah, it’s gonna be that way for a while. My sleep was a mess for the first couple weeks. You will need help during all of this, and I’m glad that you have your mom there to help out. Try and walk for like 10 minutes a day at first, even just around your home. Get your mom to help if you need her. Circulation issues prolong healing and also make sleeping harder. Make sure that your recovery area and your dilating area are calming environments, keep the area tidy as best you can and leave the windows and blinds open to keep light and air coming in. You also need to seperate your day into light time hours and dark time hours, it will help your circadian rhythm keep up with the changes in time and promote better sleep. Practice some destressing/anti anxiety techniques like meditation. Remember to look down from your phone and look at something distant for a couple minutes every so often. Eye fatigue becomes really frustrating when you’re already feeling meh in other ways.
Also, idk I’d you’ve stopped taking any opioid painkilles yet but be prepared for your stomach to be upset when you do. Wean off as best you can, increasing time between doses, staying very hydrated. Important to try and mitigate any stomach problems.