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I like the change. Both more inclusive and more exact.
Binary trans woman, full time since 2016
I like the change. Both more inclusive and more exact.
Damn I’m sorry. The only thing I can suggest is to give her space, as much as you can. You don’t deserve this.
If you have any kind of support system outside of her, now is the time. I would stay off Facebook. Trying to do damage control there with a conservative family is probably going to do more harm than good.
It’s going to hurt more before it gets better, but with time and some effort, it can get better. Care for the kids as best you can. Then care for yourself as best you can. Then care for your wife.
You have every chance of being a pretty woman. It make take hormones and time and hair removal, and maybe some makeup magic, but there will probably come a day when you can be proud of what you see in the mirror.
Regardless, who you see in the mirror is more important. Do your best, and the rest will fall as it may.
I became more extroverted. More social, more outgoing. Being able to be myself is delightful, and my old quiet bookish persona doesn’t fit me anymore.
I would expect significant change to be normal, mostly expressing ourselves in ways that didn’t feel right before or ways werl didn’t allow ourselves to in the past.
I can’t say this is something I have experienced. I got gender euphoria from the start right up to today.
But maybe you are gender fluid? If that fits then it fits. It’s OK to be a man on Tues and a woman on Friday.
There is no wrong way to be you. There is only you. The words are only important if they are useful. When words fail, you are still here, and you are more important than the words will ever be.
It’s OK to tell a story to simplify it down to strangers. (Like: I’m a trans woman) You don’t need to have the whole experience of your transition down to an elevator speech.
I say this to give some guidance on how you could move through the world. Strangers get the simple lie. Friends and family get the more nuanced truth.
Why would you be faking it?
What evidence do you have that you are trans?
What evidence do you have that you are cis?
Do you want to be trans?
Those are the starting questions?
This is sensible.
Welcome Fabienne! That is a lovely name.
I came out and started my transition over a decade ago. It’s been a wild ride from marriage equality here in the US to the current climate of fear.
I hope your journey is as rewarding as mine has been. I have a wonderful group of friends and family that supports and affirms me.
I went through a long process of deprogramming myself. I started by allowing myself to giggle. It never ends, but how it’s going is hormones replacement therapy and a second round of laser hair removal.
So, I’m pretty new to Lemmy and don’t have a whole lot of experience modding. Mostly all I did was remove spam from bots manually when I saw them. (Which became all the time and overwhelmed me)
Do we have any kind of guidelines besides don’t harass, no transphobia, etc?
Also, did I set my pronouns correctly?
My dad fell out of my life a couple decades ago and hasn’t made much effort to be a part of it since.
I think it’s great that you are spending time to learn about your daughter’s… Queer forrunners? Whatever we are to her.
Truly, I hope she doesn’t really need us. Supportive parents gives her the best chance for that, I think. I hope that by the time she is leaving school and building her own life and identity, being trans is just a tiny part of her, and barely even noticable, because the fear and the barriers that we face today have fallen away.
I hope she learns about trans day of remembrance from a history book, because we don’t need to hold it anymore.
I doubt it, but I so desperately hope that’s the world she grows up to explore.
Hi Evelyn. You can call me Dee.
I’m a redtugee, looking for a new home, liking this community.
Blahaj zone has grown by a factor of 10 since I joined.
Last week.
So I’m hoping things stay friendly and positive!
Thanks! I will do that.
I was briefly a moderator on an nsfw sub. I would be happy to help out.
Thank you so much! I found it.
Removed by mod
This is so hard.
First, it’s OK to distance yourself from “I love you, but I can’t support what you are doing.”
My mother was devastated when I came out. But after seeing that I was serious about transition and she could either get on the boat or be left behind, she decided that she should offer some help with clothes and dressing nice. She introduced me as her daughter these days. She hasn’t said anything shitty in over half a decade.
Second isolation is ok for safety, but not a long term strategy. Be nice to people, ask for help when you can, and you should meet women that will help you. Seek out queer spaces and navigate them as best you can. A trans woman taught me 95% of everything I know about makeup. My wife taught me nails when we started dating.
I’m sorry you are being hurt. It’s not fair and you don’t deserve it. Feel free to pm me if you ever want to chat, or vent, or share your stories. I love yo tell my own.