I have a condition called musical anhedonia. There are lots of us out there but we don’t show ourselves because of social stigma against not being able to enjoy music.

Slavery still affects many people today. Here is a link to many examples worth looking into.

This isn’t related to the article, but I wanted to pick at the ‘benefits of slavery’ question.

I think it’s important to acknowledge the ‘benefits’ of slavery, because it’s important to remember who it benefitted and at who’s expense. To claim that it benefits no one would be to deny the greed and callousness that spawned these human rights abuses.

Slavery in the past has brought massive advantages and benefits to many people today through the accumulation of intergenerational wealth, at the expense of minorities who are still systematically denied access to this wealth. To claim that these benefits don’t exist would be to diminish the scale of issues slavery has brought, and is still bringing, to modern day.

Good is not the enemy of perfect.

Sure. I don’t listen to music anyways. Nothing against music, just not my thing.

There’s a lot to the story that I don’t know about so I won’t be making a judgment call. However, teenagers who’ve fallen into the rabbit hole of racism and bullying aren’t easy to pull back. Whatever punishment you decide on, if it’s as harsh as that, you need to be prepared for the possibility that it may completely alienate your kid for the rest of your life.

The point of punishing her shouldn’t be for the sake of punishment, but rather to teach her how to become a better person. You can’t teach her anything if she disappears from your life. I don’t know you or her enough to know how she’ll react.

Personally, I feel that cancelling prom wouldn’t teach teenagers to stop bullying but it will teach them to hate their parents.

As for social media, instead of deleting the account and years of pictures, it would be better to deactivate the account in some way that doesn’t entail permanent deletion, and give it back to her once she has learned her lesson.

I’m going to be blunt. The way you talk about punishment feels like an outlet for your anger. And you every right to be, given what she’s done. But please remember that your daughter’s behavior isn’t set in stone. Take the steps that will actually rehabilitate her, not just punish her. Get her to write an apology letter, get her to post one last time on social media about what she did and issue an apology. Get her to offer an in person apology to the victim or parents (if that’s what they want). Make her write an essay on the impact of bullying.

Whatever you decide to do, get her to stop the hate, not hate you for the rest of her life.

Bra cups are relative to band size. For reference, a 36C is roughly the same volume as a 32E. These are call sister sizes.

I’m tired of guys saying ‘uwu G-cups’ without any context. A 30G is the same as a 42B. Start asking what their band size is ffs. It’s like saying 'she weighs 120’. 120 what? Bags of flour?

I think the misconception that you might be having is that the stress is even manageable at all. When people go through trauma at this age to this degree, there is little to no chance of managing it.

It’s like watching someone get injured in an accident and saying that if they had the opportunity to manage themselves better they could recovery without any lasting effects. Some accidents, no matter how well it’s managed by patients or doctors, will still render the patient paralyzed. Not to mention that a worse but more likely outcome is that they don’t make it out alive at all.

There is a survivorship bias here that is not seen on the surface. The reason why I am chronically ill is because the alternative in my situation is that I would be dead. You don’t see the people who had endured trauma and died, because they don’t come on Lemmy and comment.

The best possible outcome from the accident I was in that is my childhood, is that I came out of it alive, albeit physically and emotionally damaged.

I imagine these sorts of messages get attention because they can be very validating

That’s a pretty big slap in the face speaking as someone who grew up with chronic stress. I’m in my 20s. My thyroid has gone autoimmune on itself. I developed PCOS before puberty even fully set in. I have fibromyalgia, a condition that renders my entire body up in a permanent state of pain and suffering.

I didn’t get to where I am because I didn’t ‘manage my stress well enough’ or ‘didn’t look at it positively enough’. It’s not as simple as bad genetics either because people my age don’t typically have these conditions.

I don’t want to gatekept for not managing stress well enough, so I’ll just put some statistics out there: I’ve moved 26 times growing up, went to 14 different schools, lost 13 pets consecutively, sexually abused before I was 10, called the cops due to life threatening situations 4 times in my life, and went no contact with everyone I was related to. The fact that I made it to adulthood alive should be proof enough that this isn’t a stress management issue.

When you live in chronic distress, not eustress, your body will eventually pay the price. There’s a book called ‘The Body Keeps the Score’ by Vessel Van Der Kolk that does a fantastic job of explaining this. As a result of my body breaking down in pain and no longer being able to exercise, live, and function the way I used to, I will most likely die sooner than I would have if environment conditions didn’t trigger all these latent health conditions. And that’s ok.

What’s not ok is being told that I could have better health outcomes if I had just look at my stress more positively. Buddy, if I look at my stress any more positively than I did I would no longer be managing my stress I would straight up be in denial that anything bad even happened.

Cantonese: 陳大文 (can4 daai6 man4) Japanese: 山田太郎 (yamada taro)

Good for yourself and all, but just as a reminder that Christmas can be secular and anti-capitalist at the same time. You don’t need to exchange gifts, be religious, or have any beliefs or traditions about it.

It can just be an excuse to get together, cook, and have dinner. It doesn’t need to be elaborate either. Christmas for many people just means a time of the year you set aside to appreciate family, friends, and loved ones.