In fact, one systematic review found that the average prevalence of surgical regret was 14.4% among all research studies analyzed

Holy shit that’s actually crazy to me. [I actually tracked down that number because I was so curious] (https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1007/s00268-017-3895-9) It’s over half cancer surgery. I’ve known that the regret rate for transition surgery was low for a long time, but that piece of context kinda blows my mind. You’re more likely to regret a variety of life saving procedures than gender affirming surgery, and it’s often by insane orders of magnitude.

A markedly less successful ripoff of Tubular Bells

If you’re of OG Futurama age, King of the Hill is pretty good about not being transphobic. I will always love Hank refusing to speak to Peggy’s friend Caroline when she answered the phone in boy mode. No, he’s looking for his wife’s friend Caroline. Please don’t try to confuse him with stories about who she used to be. He used to sell jeans, and only people close to him know that.

Random trans folk I see look right past me.

I had this happen with a whole group of trans women staying at the motel I used to work at. I passed to them to the point that there was no “oh hey!” moment, no Charlie Kelly meerkat eyes. It was a strange experience, at once sad and satisfied?

Now I work at a dispensary and smoke or vape weed every day. For better or worse, I’ll never voice pass consistently in a world with legal weed. Which I guess is fine. I’m not especially fond of the “oh whoa” moment on the faces of straight men who have decided from a distance I was a hotgirl™ and they were gonna treat me a certain way, but I guess I’d rather disarm straight people than be invisible to young trans girls.

the models and movie stars and idols and influencers

Most of them don’t actually “look like that.” They are photographed from the best angles with expensive camera equipment and lighting. Then they select the best photos from a series of mediocre to great shots. These selected photos are often then edited. There are billions of women who could look like that if they had $20k to drop on a professional makeover and photoshoot

Infochammel vibes

I’m an autonomy maximalist. If you think this is right for you, do it. It’s just a wild idea to me. For me, it was a door that, once opened, could not be closed.

Ngl I wouldn’t do that for a partner. Not a chance. I don’t have family in my life. No future partners of mine will meet my family. I don’t have to meet my partners’ families. I wouldn’t make myself miserable for two weeks minimum for any family. Not a chance I would do this. You say “when I am safe again.” I wouldn’t be with a partner who wanted me to feel like that for their comfort.

There is literally only one person developing SDV and Haunted Chocolatier. This is literally an impossible statement. There is only ConcernedApe, and he has not announced any cancelation.

Tbh I play the hell out of some Kairosoft games on mobile <_< I love watching my little guys thrive.

BG3 is a huge exception. It’s more popular by far than most games of the sort. And still only two of the dozen gamers I work with has played any of it, and they are both done with it.

all these gamers glowing about how great it is

Where? If you mean online, yeah, online discussion and gaming publications focus on more complex games that more serious gamers are playing. There’s just more to say about them. And news sites are gonna pay more attention to exceptions to the norm like BG3. None of the many gamers in my life are talking about it. If you’re hearing about BG3 and other huge, complex games regularly, it’s because you are spending time in spaces where and with people who care about them. Because it’s not just everywhere.

Oh yeah I know that, it just seems like these type of games are super popular.

I honestly think that’s just your circle. That does not describe the majority of the gamers I know or have known. I have always been in a minority for wanting to do math in my free time and have to find places online to discuss these games because usually nobody else in my life is playing them. Most of the people I know who played BG3 did so because it is popular, and they avoided as much of the math and homework as possible. And most of them are done with it.

There are tons of games that don’t require that sort of knowledge base or study investment. It’s a minority that do. But you’re on Lemmy. This is a self selected community of extra thoughtful nerds. This community is more likely to be excited about games with homework than your average gaming community. I do genuinely love the research part of complex games. I like crafting builds and planning battles. I loved both Divinity Original Sin games and will love BG3 when I get there.

But sometimes I do just want a game for my hands to play while by brain takes a break. That’s why I spent most of the summer with Earth Defense Force 5, a 9/10 space insect exploding experience. Highly recommend it if you don’t want to fuck with the details.

Don’t ask me. Is that what you want to do? If you think that would get you closer to the person you want to be, do it. Do everything that you think will make you into the person you want to be. Do every stupid little thing that makes you feel alive. Concentrate your whole body, with its 360 bones and joints, and 84,000 hair follicles, into this question of who Sky is; day and night, without ceasing, hold it before you. You must be to yourself like gulping a hot iron ball, which you can neither swallow nor spit out.

I feel we’ve talked about this before, Sky. HRT doesn’t change your body. It changes how your body changes. If you don’t change your body, your body won’t change. You have to take control of your body. You are the only one with the power to change it. It’s not going to happen for or to you. You’re an adult. Your autonomy is perfect and infinite. Use it. Claim from the universe the Sky shaped space you want.

Idk maybe you could find a more fucked up picture with fewer pixels for us to study =P Seriously, Sky, this isn’t a meaningful image. This image allows you to fill in the blanks with whatever terrible emotions you’re feeling at the moment you look at it. It doesn’t serve you, and you should treat yourself better than this. You’re basically bullying yourself. You should get someone who cares about you to take and select some pictures to share. They have a more objective view of your body and appearance.

Anyone can take a bad picture. I can take a shitty, low res picture that makes me look awful. I often have to take and shuffle through several shots to get the good one. And I’m fucking hot =P

And the weight distribution is somehow unpredictable no matter how many times you carry one.

X

F

D

I’ve been flirting with an elusive trans boy. Maybe one day I’ll be as lucky as you, getting smacked by his silicone dick x_x

Forget what you see. Accept that you are currently cursed with illusion. To me you just look like a very, very sad girl. You look like the before in a before and after psychiatry, not HRT. I honestly think you’re kind of adorable. You have a very cutesy, round Midwestern girl face. But the sadness in your photos is overwhelming. I wish I could make you feel safe.

Find yourself a friend to go thrift store a shopping with. This requires you to have the courage to hang out and really shop because you have to sort and parse through the extraordinarily random selection, but they tend to have an above average proportion of clothes in rarer sizes. I’m not super tall at 5’9", but thrift stores are the only places I go that regularly have clothing too long and tall for me. I can always find skirts to step on at Goodwill! I’m very slim and wear a small in many brands, but I tend to find at least one skirt I would get if only it were shorter per Goodwill trip. And most thrift stores have done away with trying things in store in favor of a one week return policy. Just make sure you’ll be able to get back within that time, and you can try everything on in the privacy of your own home. The post shopping fashion show is part of the thrift store experience in my house.

You can also get cutes belts! It only helps with things that almost fit anyway, but it can seriously make a difference in the number of applicable garments you find.