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Depends on how they feel about trans people, test the waters. A subtle way is to ask a guy (or a few) role model(s) near you if they have ever thought about what it is like to be a girl.
My parents are fairly conservative, and I ran into the snag of the FIRST guy I asked was like “oh, yeah. All guys think that.” And then I just bought it for years.
Still, it is good to plant the seed.
A 17 year old and an 18 year old are only a year apart in maturity. It’s essentially comparable to a 17 and 16 year old. 2 years apart starts to get gray as far as morality goes. I’m against 16 and 19, but i can imagine extremely remote cases where it might be acceptable, but that is stretching my objective capabilities. 16 and 20 is too far. As you get closer to 25 and the brain is fully developed, the margins get wider.
For instance, 18 and 22? That goes back to stretching it. 19 and 23? Back to morally Grey. 20 and 24? Fine.
Ephebophelia definitions are meant to cast a wide net to protect as many people as possible. Just get over it for societies greater good.